“Normal” life

Recently I think more and more often about a “normal” life. I am not so sure I know how it is, since did not live such a life for a while. I think having an apartment in a European capital, a nice girlfriend, cinema after work, staying late in bed on Saturday, in the weekend going for horseback riding, playing tennis would pretty much qualify as a “normal” life. It is quite a common place, but I feel more and more that I want to move back to Europe and have such life, at least for a while.

I know that I will miss being in the field like hell, but at this point in time, I think I am at the point when I can take such  risk. I don’t even know if it’s a risk. What I have now? Two relationships in ruins, living in a tent in the middle of nowhere, each day meeting the same people, the job in not challenging anymore. And I am more and more skeptical about humanitarian/development assistance. Yap, if I put it this way it is really time for change:) Let’s see what the next 1-2 months are bringing.

Poor Story

Some three weeks ago I finished “Poor Story” by Giles Bolton. Probably he will not read this blog, however why not say it: thumbs up for Michael Bolton’s relative;)!

Probably this book should be a must for all interested in humanitarian aid, trade, state subventions and Africa. Due to its language and style of writing, it is easily digestible: you don’t need to be a lawyer or speak fluent UNish. I would even take it one step further: not just easily digestible, but in many places quite entertaining.

Basically, the book criticizes the current humanitarian system. Not just criticizes, but actually comes up with some smart solutions (I don’t always agree with Bolton’s ideas).

Let’s take NGOs: most of them are too small and can have only a local effect. Instead of donating to a “street corner” NGO, rather give your donation to well known and professional NGOs. Even better if you commit to monthly or yearly donations, thus the NGO doesn’t need to spend money on fundraising just to catch your attention (and money) again.

National donors: in a third world country more than half of the qualified Ministry staff is writing reports to different national donors or trying to get funds. Needless to say that only by accident can the reporting guidelines be the same. Why not channel all the funds into 3-4 national donors, argues the writer. I see the point behind the suggestion, but I don’t really see Saudis channelling their money through USAID.

The writer’s formula for real poverty reduction is choosing relatively accountable, committed Governments and channel the money through the Government. Only this way the effect can be nationwide and sustainable. Uganda is mentioned as a positive example where the poverty rate fell with more than 20% in the last ten years (I don’t have the book in front of me, so hope don’t make big mistakes with the figures).

Other interesting info. The total amount of the US cotton subventions is higher than the value of the US cotton production. If the EU would cut subventions and import food items (for example sugar from Tanzania, where it is much easier and cheaper to produce it than in Sweden…) each EU citizen would pay 1,200 euros less at the supermarkets.

I left my favourite idea (actually it is the writer’s idea) as last. Politicians are interested in us only every 4-5 years, if they get the go ahead definitely they will plan only until the next elections. Let’s not have too high expectations from them as far as 3rd world countries are concerned. And let’s stop complaining that the state structures are getting weaker in comparison with multinationals: let’s use multinationals for poverty reduction. Each day you go to the supermarket and you buy a product, in fact you cast a vote. And the multinationals are constantly (not just every 4 years) interested in you and what you are thinking about them. And definitely what you buy. So, buy smartly!!

Gender equality

Our local staff is exclusively men, while our expat staff (not counting myself) is exclusively women. Often gender issues come up (probably it is not easy for the guys to take orders from a woman) and for some strange reason I really like these discussions. Probably I am the only one who finds it funny, because sometimes the girls simply cannot take such discussions, which I think I understand.

During the weekend we were chatting with one of the local staff who posed a very “interesting” question: “Why you don’t beat women in Europe?”. I was struggling for a while to explain how it is in Europe, but after I while I needed to acknowledge that I failed in my attempt:)

This is the same staff who in my first week of stay in South Sudan told me: “Wife not complaining good wife, wife complaining kill wife”. Probably it is only his big mouth but what was rather shocking for me was the strange smile on his face when he said “kill wife”.

Still Kenya

Kenya calmed down a bit, but still no solution in sight. Desmond Tutu, John Kufuor, US envoys, EU representatives are flying in and out, trying to make the parties agree on some constructive schedule for the next days. I guess there is nothing more frightening than Kenya plunging into ethnic violence.

Another very frightening issue is that Kenya is a key link in the supply chain for all the region: South Sudan, Somalia, Uganda, Tanzania etc. I have friends who supposed to come back to S Sudan by road and now they are stuck in Uganda due to fuel shortages. The same in Juba: there is only one more gas station with fuel, the town will probably run out of fuel in 3-4 days.

I was just downloading some photos from my camera and found this picture that I took just on the day of the election.

 

In other developments, there were elections in Georgia yesterday. I stayed there for a while and I still remember how angry people were with Sakashvili, but I guess he is the only viable choice. The Georgians also thought the same, since it looks that he was re-elected and actually won in the 1st round. Of course the opposition is accusing him of vote rigging:) Can any party nowadays accept loosing elections?

Post-election Kenya

I spent the weekend in Nairobi and left Kenya on Monday. While I was there, there were already riots in the Kibera slum, lot of police and military on the road, most of downtown totally deserted. My flight got cancelled on Sunday and airline did not want to let me go back to the hotel; people were really afraid about what will happen.

On Sunday afternoon the results were announced and half an hour later (what a rush) Mwai Kibaki was sworn in. By the time I got back to the hotel, there were already two armed guards at the gate.

If I could decide on the future President of Kenya, probably I would choose Kalonzo. None of the frontrunners deserve to lead Kenya. Raila Odinga announced that he won the elections before any final results were published. His supporters went on the streets celebrating, tensions started to rise. How a responsible politician can do this? If his supporters believed him, of course a day later they will feel like cheated when Kibaki is announced winner. And again they will take it to the streets, this time with machetes and some extra apetite for destruction.

In the other corner, Mwai Kibaki, who is sworn in minutes after the results are announced. In a normal situation you wait a bit more than just few minutes. You need to allow time for an eventual appeal against the final results and a solution/answer for the appeal. And Kibaki just rushed in as a hot-headed teenager.

I really like Kenya (haven’t seen a lot so far) and like Kenyans. Simply I cannot believe what is going on over there. Kenya is one of the regional powerhouses, a model in the region with a growing economy and a relatively stable political system. How could the two candidates allow Kenya to descend to tribal violence? Do they understand that they are responsible for all the violence and the lives of more than 300 people?

Apparently, today a big opposition rally will take place in downtown Nairobi even if it was banned by the police. Raila Odinga called for a million people to join the demonstration. I just hope it will not end in a bloodbath, since the police have “shoot to kill” orders.

I already saw that some journalist compare Kenya with Rwanda or use the word “genocide”. I think that is a bit out of line, but it is good at least that the world is paying attention, which does not come as a surprise since UK and the US have a lot of interest in Kenya.

On the other hand, it is good not to forget that in Kenyan history these were only the second elections. The Kenyan democracy is still young. One evening a taxi driver was taking me and friends back to the hotel. We were discussing with him about some political issues, a propos elections, and then he told us something that kept us laughing for some good minutes even if it was not that funny. He said: “But remember, this is still Africa!”

The new year

I am just returning from my best Christmas holidays ever. It is such a huge contrast between my holidays and now being in Juba, town/city which anyway I don’t like. And I am stuck here for some time.

After over-sleeping on the 1st of January (which I guess it is quite normal) came back to the deserted UNOCHA compound: no friends and loved ones around, having a horrible hangover and headache. In other words, it was not really the best beginning of the year. Usually I can deal easily with missing people, but now I found this feeling much harder to handle. The good news is that from here the only way is up. I guess.

When I was returning to the compound after the party, the car stereo was playing Christmas classics, such as “White Christmas”. Being in a car with air conditioning (which by the way I hate), outside the Sun burning, red dust rising, tukuls and Christmas classics. It felt like a very strange paradox: being so much out of place that I actually fitting in like a piece of puzzle. The strangest feeling, so hard to describe. After some time the “fitting” feeling went away and the “being out of place” feeling stayed. Very, very bitter sweet.

Today got back to work, which is good since have a lot of things to do and at least I don’t need to think about philosophical and existential issues:)

Friends and loved ones who are reading this: miss you a lot.

The hospital killings

When you read about incidents involving humanitarian workers and humanitarian organisations (kidnappings, killings, attacks on the compound etc, and this is only the beginning of the list), usually it is about people that you don’t know, somewhere in a far away place in a context which is hard to understand. However, it is not hard to feel sympathy for the humanitarian workers involved. This time it was different: it did not happen somewhere far.

At the end of November, 2007, in Bor, an angry crowd of people from the Dinka tribe attacked the MSF managed hospital trying to kill patients from the Murle tribe (there is a long running animosity between the two tribes). Parts of the patients were in the MSF compound (waiting to be taken to the airstrip) where the expats were living and where the offices of the organisation were. This did not stop the angry crowd to force their way in to the compound and eventually beat to death with sticks harmless patients. Some patients survived only thanks to dedicated local MSF staff (also from the Dinka tribe!).

After some days I looked on the internet for news about the killings in the MSF compound, just to see how it is being reported. This time I was reading about people that I know and like a lot, about places I know and a context which is familiar. It is so different to read a news when “MSF expat staff” actually means names, faces and good time spent together.

The staff got evacuated right after the incident, some more, some less traumatised. Probably it is not easy to get over of what happened on that day. For us Westerners/Europeans such violence is out of ordinary, which is normal. But what is rather abnormal is that for people living here such violence might be part of everyday life. Expats can leave the country, but the Sudanese stay, endure while tomorrow might bring such violence again.

After the visit

This is getting boring again in Juba. This time it feels like a semi-holiday. Spent the last two evenings sitting on the shore of the Nile, drinking beer, enjoying a pipe.  In the background (for the third day) a romantic song selection ranging from Spice Girl to Celine Dion, from Backstreet Boys to Cindy Lauper. Probably I would never listen to these songs at home, but here they mean a piece of home. However strange it may sound:)

I am here with my new colleague. She is just great, so easy to get along with her, great sense of humour. I can really use a bit a calm. Last two weeks my supervisor was here and it turned out to be quite a busy time. It’s not that I was afraid that I will get fired or something like that, I wasn’t even stressed, I was simply tired. And missed the independency and quiet life I had before my holidays. Anyway, having the supervisor here was good: at least people in the HQ will know how hard it is to work here, will know what kind of difficulties we are facing.

Sudan and South Sudan is simply not getting quieter. Salva Kiir (President of South Sudan and Vice President of Sudan) just returned from a visit in the US. Appearently Bashir (the Sudanese President) got really annoyed with this visit and made some rather beligerent comments. Of course this did not pass by unnoticed. Salva Kiir’s answer was a bit more diplomatic, however the war of declarations started. The biggest issue is the border demarcation in the oil rich Abiyei region. Soldiers which were stationed next to our compound are getting deployed next to the border region. Does not look good. It would be such a pity if things would get worse. The people of this country deserve much more, especially after being for so many years at war. Just got news today that UNHCR and IOM resumed the repatriation from the Kakuma camp. If things will get worse everything that was built in the last 2 years can be wiped out in a matter of minutes. Sad topic but had to mention it.

I often wonder if being here as a development NGO really makes sense, does it really improve the life of people here. But as I see it the only  alternative of being here is not being here. And that would not be good either. It depends on the way: sometimes I really see sense in being here, sometimes I am rather sceptical.

It is interesting that I rather write from Juba and not from my duty station. Even if I have sometimes oportunity to use internet in a quiet moment, there so many more interesting things to do . It was so great to get back. To meet friends, to catch up with what happened in the last two weeks. I am happy that I am not working in the capital. This way people know me, stop me on the street, ask me how was my holiday. Getting together with the small NGO community is just another highlight. It is interesting how fast personal relationship evolve in such circumstances. My duty station in a way it is like a microcosmos: simply there is everything, but on a small scale. I am happy to be there and feels great that I found my place at least for the next 6 months.

In Juba again

Recently I’ve been lazy. NOT:)! Just back from my “holidays” and again in Juba. Holidays, schmolidays. Eventually I had only one free day, which I spent with solving some not-so-nice personal issue. The rest of the days was working, but anyway I feel recharged like a Duracell bunny. It might be the good food, the change of climate (I don’t think so) or it might have to do with the fact of having friends around. I haven’t talked in my mother tongue for ages, now almost everyday, which was so nice.

While I was in Poland the 4^th Republic collapsed. The twin era is over, however in four years they might be back with a vengeance. The new Polish Prime Minister is called Donald Tusk. Of course in Polish it has different pronunciation then in English, but I imagine Donald arriving to meet the Queen and the Queen bursts out in laughing when hearing his name. But anyway, he is a good guy; probably just the parents were too much into Disney.

Just before I left Sudan, the SPLM (Sudanese People Liberation Movement) which is the political wing of the SPLA (Sudanese People Liberation Army) withdrew its Ministers from the Khartoum government. Let’s just say that this might have bigger consequences than the fall of the 4^th Republic. Recently I was not following the issue, but I hope it got some attention. Fortunately or unfortunately, the world is rather focusing on Darfur, almost totally forgetting about South Sudan and the fragile peace. Which is a pity, but I guess for an average TV viewer Iraq, Darfur, Afghanistan and the Ebola outbreak in DRC is more than enough.

Anyways. Now I am back and in a very strange twisted way it feels a bit like home. Maybe not just a bit. Of course, since stepping out from the plane the problem-avalanche started. But recently I just relax, take a deep breath and say “hakuna matata”. I did my best, cannot do more. Doing this I scare myself a bit: what will happen if I leave the continent and go back to Europe? I am sure that there the “hakuna matata” won’t work

Back to …

I am again in Juba. Looks like I have time to only write from here. Or rather have proper net connection only from here. I think last time I wrote maybe two weeks ago. Well, a lot of things happened since then and I still have the feeling that nothing is slowing down, things are just gathering more and more speed. And I used to be such a good boy. Since last time I wrote I was stopped at night a couple of times at gunpoint by drunk soldiers. I never thought that I could handle this kind of situations, but since I am still alive looks like I am good at it. I ran into some troubles with the Sudanese traffic police: quite “entertaining” it was, but at least now I have a Sudanese driving licence also for trucks, heavy vehicles and busses. Yap, and I almost forgot that I am just over my first malaria. It wasn’t so bad when I had it, it is rather bad after it. The doctors say it is the side effect of the drugs. I tend to believe them since it is rather unusual for me to get depressed for 3-4 hours on a daily basis.

Tomorrow I am leaving to Nairobi and from there back to the “home country” for holiday. I am quite afraid to go back and I know that during the two weeks I will be away, I will miss my small town like hell. Not that there is much to miss, but I already have “my” coffeeshop, “my” restaurants and so on. But most of all I will miss the Sun. The European greyish autumn will just make me depressed. But as I often say, what to do?

I am planning for long to write a longer post and describe things here, hope will manage to do that during my “holiday”. See you soon!